My Bucket List of Sorts

For anyone that reads my blog at bipolartater.com, or my posts on TheMighty.com, you will know that I have been through a lot and am currently going through a huge struggle. Through the years of bullying and commentary from my current struggle, I have been told many times that I will never be able to do things. So, sitting here writing this post, I think why do all the bullies that have torn me down get to win, why do all my former friends that I now realize sucked for the last eight plus years get to win, and why does everyone trying to write my story for me get to win. So in order to take back my life and prove everyone wrong I have compiled a list of things I want to accomplish to so people I can overcome anything and perceiver. This list is sort of like my bucket list, a list that I want to accomplish, and I feel it is possible with all the amazing people that have come out to show me support on the TheMighty.com, and the two amazing women that have came into my life during this struggle, and the amazingness of my one lone friend and her daughter, and finally the female that I met this past Tuesday that have a tremendous impact on my day. So here is my list so far, this is sort of a working list, as my mind allows me to recall the things, I have been told I can’t do.

• Find a career that matters and be successful.
  • This relates to people telling me I will never be able to develop a career especially after the legal drama that is currently going on, but this is something I have been told for a very long time. This also comes from being told I am a loser.
• Find friends
  • This one stems from the years of being told I am undesirable and that no one cares about me and that I am a loser. This also comes from all the years of people I thought were my friends destroying me more.
• Find a relationship
  • This also stems from being told I am undesirable, ugly, a loser. This comes from recent comments that no one will ever want to date someone with a criminal record no matter the story.
• Being an advocate
  • This one stems from being told that no one cares about me or what I have to say. This also comes from being told I am ugly because some have furthered the comment that no one will be able to stand looking at me in a video on YouTube.
• Have a family
  • While this one ties to the relationship goal, I have been told many times that no one will ever want to start a family with me let alone build a life together.
• Find someone that will listen to my story
  • This one is a personally goal of mine. I want nothing more than to take back my narrative. I want one person to want to hear my story with my narrative.