September 1, 2022: Words….. The negative and the positive
Words… so easily spoken yet the weight is never considered. Sometimes they can make your feel amazing and cared about and sometimes they make you feel like garbage.
“You’re horrible”
“you’re ugly”
“No one will ever want you”
“You’re a flirt”
“you should kill yourself and rid this world of such a horrible person”
These are some of the most noticeable comments from the past year. These words did nothing to those who spoke these towards me, maybe a few got enjoyment out of saying them. But truly what benefit did these words provide the speaker. But to be they were like being stabbed with a knife each time a larger knife. Until the pain no longer felt like a stab but instead felt like something much worse. These words along with the million other hurtful works spoke to me or about me shaped me into development a mental illness and having my entire personality and mind altered. Without these words, I may still have had a mental illness, but not to this extent. Looking back with a clearer prospective I honestly could say if it were for hurtful words at particular times in my like, I would not be a suicide attempt survivor, I would not be socially awkward and afraid of judgement, and I most certainly would like be in legal trouble.
I truly understand some crimes that are committed they are truly unthinkable and unimaginable, but what about the crimes that are committed because someone was driven to do something because of the actions of others. Are those that drove the person to the action, not even I the smallest way criminals too? The media so often paints this picture that of those that find themselves in terrible situations, creating a narrative that in written by someone that has never interacted with you in their life. These narratives are so often what society views as the truth, often negating the narrative of the person living the life and through the action.
What drove that person to steal? Was it the only way they could feed their family, or the media doesn’t care about the perspective of the individual. And so too often when the person shares even the slight bit of their story with the media, they take it and run with it distorting and manipulating it to sell more newspapers.
While not a criminal action in society’s eyes, what about the person or child that commits suicide because they can’t handle the negativity society throughs at them or the day to day bullying? The media never persecutes the cause. Instead, they persecute the individual that has committed suicide because the person had a mental illness. Further increasing the stigmas and stereotypes related to mental health. The media doesn’t care, what drove that person to commit suicide. Often these stories any recognition, but a nice write up in the obituary of how they lost the battle with their mental health or demons.
It is time for people to Take Back The Narrative and stop the media from getting to say whatever they want about someone. It time for people to be able to speak their own narrative and not have someone with no knowledge of the individual being in control of the narrative. Your Story is not over yet, and it damn well should be written by someone without any care about you. It is time people to stop listening to narratives told by anyone other than the person living the life. Take back your narrative and be the engineer for your story. The remove of the ability to tell your story is what is making mental health such a serious issue because people are unwilling to tell their stories and when they don’t tell their story, we are only left with stories made up about people by people that aren’t living through the mental illness.
On the flip words can be an amazing thing. Today alone I was received some kind words from my therapist and my psychiatrist including:
“There is nothing wrong you, you have a mental illness and I recognize that but to me you are still a person not someone I view as having an issue.”
“You are not broken”
“You are such a passionate and caring person and would make an amazing nurse”
“No matter what you go through I will be here for you every step of the way”
“I want to help you have the best life possible and will do anything I can to help make that happen”
“You always know how to make me smile; you have a way of bringing the best out in people”
“You may have been through a lot, but you have a story that can change so many lives, and I look forward to reading it someday”
Words in this light have a positive impact, increase someone’s mood and wellbeing. These are examples of how people should interact with one another, but instead the negative light is all too often chosen. Words have a lot of weight, a weight that can be made so much lighten when they are geared toward the positive.
Research has shown the positive effects of gratitude, on the individual expressing, but also on the individual the gratitude is expressed toward. If just a simple concept of gratitude can have that much of an impact, image how much the use of words in a positive manner can have on someone and yourself.
Mental health is important for everyone regardless of if they have a mental illness too. Why not boast the mental health of someone import in your life or that of a total stranger, you may just your own mental health in the process.